Chapter 536: An Orchestra For You, Part 16
Author's Preface
Lower back, throat, nose.
What do you think these are?
These are the body parts the author messed up at the end of Golden Week.
My throat is raspy! My lower back hurts! Hay fever!!!
Yesterday was a good game... A brawl broke out thanks to a one-man play by the walk-on long snapper, the Goldie Scorpion, and I scored a touchdown... I worked up a good sweat.
For earning some pocket change, grinding EXP, and farming Vorpal Soul all at once, those scorpions really are the ultimate hunting ground... The fact that they'll charge right in for self-defense without fearing the Scars gives them high points in my book.
"Man, I felt like I was stuck in a rut for the first time in a while."
"Is... that so. Um, well, as for me... things have been going okay, I guess?"
Okay? As in, O.K. to K.O. everyone? [*1] Just how many people did she slaughter... No, that's not very funny. Go rot in the depths of the scrap pile, you trash gag.
Fundamentally, fast travel doesn't exist in ShanFro. You can tell there's a massive demand for fast travel via teleportation magic just from the fact that Deep Slaughter makes a killing running a transport business, which also means that learning teleportation magic must be an absurdly high-difficulty task.
Which is exactly why having a Named Vorpal Bunny is such a massive advantage. Like giving an iron club to a demon, giving fast travel to a hardcore gamer makes you wonder just what kind of state the player known as Psyger-0 is in right now... Hehehe, just unlocking the level cap made her look like that. I'm starting to get scared to even find out.
"............"
"Is something wrong, Saiga-san?"
"W-Well, um!"
"O-Oh."
"Hizutome-kun, um... could you maybe tell me... where you've decided to go for college...?"
"My future plans? Raiou University's Faculty of Economics."
"...I, see."
It's Takeda-shi's top recommendation, and it's well within striking distance for my grades, so I decided on my path forward pretty easily. I've heard all sorts of things about it—like how Takeda-shi has a friend there, or that it's a pretty laid-back college despite its deviation value—but he also gave it his mysterious seal of approval by saying, "It's full of weirdos, so Sunraku-shi will fit right in, de gozaru yo!" I can't help but feel those aren't the kind of words you use to recommend a school to an absolutely normal, average citizen like myself. But coming from the same guy who casually predicted a major corporation's stock market crash with the same ease as forecasting tomorrow's weather, I don't really have any reason to doubt him either.
"What about you, Saiga-san?"
"What a coincidence. I am also going to Raiou."
"O-Oh."
What was that just now? For a second there she sounded like a robot or something... No, what is wrong with me! Asking a hardcore gamer about their real-life future is practically a taboo, isn't it? I mean, sure, she brought it up first, but it's only natural for the light of life to vanish from a hardcore gamer's eyes when discussing reality.
"B-But Raiou is over in Tokyo, right? Are you planning on living alone too, Saiga-san?"
"That's... right, I, believe, that is... the plan."
"But considering rent and all that, I've heard room-sharing ends up being a lot cheaper, so I'm keeping that option in mind too."
Commuting from another prefecture is an option, I guess, but given my lifestyle rhythm, I feel like things will go horribly wrong if I don't give myself plenty of leeway for morning classes... Wait, didn't I hear that university classes don't necessarily start in the morning? Does that mean it's not a problem?
"Room-sharing............ Rooooms-shaaariiiing?"
What was that vibrato just now? It had a twist in it like a corkscrew.
"Eh? Yeah, pretty much."
For some reason, Saiga-san's body froze at that word and began to tremble in small, violent shivers... I-Is it your usual seizure, Saiga-san!?
"H-Hey, your nose is bleeding!?"
"It's a minor injury so there is no problem, even if it's a nosebleed the blood vessels passing through the nose are capillaries so as long as I deal with it quickly by stopping the bleeding there's absolutely no problem whatsoever in fact thanks to the hyperactive effects at work my capillaries will become even stronger—"
"No, I'm pretty sure it's a fatal wound socially!?"
This isn't a battlefield or a hospital, so a high school girl going to school with blood pouring out of her nose checks all the boxes for heresy, foreign object, and abnormality, doesn't it!?
"I'm perfectly fine, it's absolutely not because the simulation brought about by the hypothetical definition of my future plans got twisted and warped or anything like that... Please excuse me for a moment."
Averting her face for some reason, Saiga-san crouched down behind a telephone pole, rummaging around to pull out a handkerchief... and probably pressed it against her face?
"Fupushu."
"?"
".........Yes, I'm alright now."
"!?"
The bleeding... stopped...!?
"It's just a... minor hemostatic technique... of my family's."
The Saiga family is amazing.
A scene today that suddenly brought an extreme sense of reality to my personal theory that the great ninja clans are "Iga", "Kouga", and "Saiga"...
◆
And so, I am currently here in Rabituza.
Akitsu Akane had somehow acquired a top-tier Hidden Class, and Imron was getting the crap beaten out of him by Bilac, so it was pretty noisy around here, but I had my own things to do.
"Boss, I forged a friendship with the Giant race... and heard about the old promise."
"Figured you would..."
"And, from the Chief of the Giant race... an old message."
"......"
Did he know the words I was about to say, or did he not? Unlike his children, this presumed Unique Boss basically wore a constant, archaic smile.
It was difficult to gauge from his current demeanor just how much he knew or didn't know. I wanted to say that leaving a message for Pioneers visiting in the future meant he probably already had a pretty good idea, but there was no point in trying to read too deeply into the hidden motives of this kind of fetch quest.
"She said... 'Even in death, even if parted'."
"...Hah, is that so."
Silence.
The smoldering purple smoke spread thinly and faded away... and then, finally, Vash opened his mouth.
"That's just... some stupid wordplay, you see. Gatherin' 'round, raisin' our cups..."
"........."
No matter how much I might try to pry into an NPC's past, I'm completely unrelated to it at the end of the day. Remaining silent, speaking nothing, and just focusing on listening is the better option...
"Got a little gloomy there. Ain't no need to remember that."
"No..."
"More importantly, Sunraku... looks like yer taking quite a bit of time there..."
There was no need to ask what he meant.
"Ashamed to say........."
"Listen here, I ain't got no intention of forcefully twisting yer path. And I ain't got no intention of chipping away at their will either..."
However, he continued, pointing the tip of his kiseru pipe at me, as the ash spilling from the bowl briefly glowed red before vanishing into the void.
"But if yer just gonna stand around listening, yer never gonna overcome Orchestra."
"I've been flying and bouncing around in some pretty massive brawls, for the record."
"Kakaka... As long as yer being swallowed up, the fog ain't never gonna clear, you know?"
Hmm, I need a decoding squad. Were those words related to Orchestra, or just a simple encouragement event...? But Orchestra is simple. And precisely because it's simple, I don't have many ideas on what else I could actually do.
Maybe rig the music player with something before the fight? No, that gives off the overwhelming feeling that doing so would result in an instant failure... But why would Vash of all people offer words that sound like advice regarding an uncleared Orchestra Unique Scenario?
"........."
Perhaps finding amusement in my troubled state, the white-ash rabbit warped the corners of his mouth into a joyful smirk, swaying the smoke flowing from his pipe as if drawing something with it... and told me this.
"When ya cut through the wind and find a path through the vortex... come see me."
"...?"
"When that time comes, I'll lend ya a little bit of my strength."
Hyun! The kiseru swung down from above in a single flash, severing the smoldering smoke.
The smoke, cleanly bisected, was swept away by a sudden breeze from nowhere, brushing against my cheek.
For some reason, it felt exactly like my cheek had just been licked by a rough, sandpaper-like tongue............ I wonder what on earth caused this sudden chill running down my spine.
Author's Afterword
A university professor mixes ethanol with oolong tea [*2] and teaches classes using an extremist faction riot baton [*3] inherited from his great-grandfather as a pointer! That's Raiou University for you!
Thanks to taking mechanical engineering way too seriously, there's a club that has been building ultra-realistic maid robots for the past eight generations of students! That's Raiou University for you!
Almost every single photo of the past university presidents is a goofy face! That's Raiou University for you!
Basically, the only people there have a few screws loose or completely missing! That's Raiou University for you!
Can our protagonist and heroine actually survive in such a demon realm!!
They'll probably adapt with zero issues.
※It is not the university that The Professor or Seto attend, nor is it the one Pencilgon and the others went to.
It's just the alma mater of those three ShanFro developers.
Translator's Notes
- [1] Bochi-bochi: A common Japanese phrase meaning "so-so," "okay," or "little by little." Sunraku deliberately misinterprets it as the identical-sounding word 墓地 (bochi), meaning "graveyard," to joke about Psyger-0's absurd PK/combat record.
- [2] ethanol with oolong tea: Grand Blue (manga and anime) reference. In the series, the chaotic college diving club seniors frequently hand people "Oolong Tea." However, their version of "Oolong Tea" is actually a flammable, 90%+ ABV concoction made by mixing clear vodka and brown whiskey until it matches the exact color of tea.
- [3] Geba-bou: A wooden pole or stave historically used by radical student factions in Japan during the protests of the 1960s and 70s, short for "Gewalt (Violence) Baton".
Comments
Post a Comment