Chapter 573: Even the Road Home Has Its Stumbling Blocks
Author's Preface
Uoooohhhh! I'm sorry the update is late!! It's mostly the Arch-Tempered Elder Dragon's fault!! Okay, I shifted the blame, but it's really the author's fault, I'm seriously sorry!!!
Also, I started a Twitter account. The answer for the activity report is that the ID corresponds to the model number of a specific card. I reflect on the fact that it was honestly too hard to figure out.
You can probably find me if you search for Katarina...
Those five raised fingers probably meant 5k or something. Yeah, that had to be it. Believing that, I gently placed the Diamond Badugamosu-kun back into my bag, wondering if its unreadable expression was mocking me or smiling warmly at me for enduring the gut-wrenching agony of turning down a scalper's offer. Scalping... is bad...!
Setting that aside, we had a very fruitful time overall, even getting some advice from the Supernova staff that you could basically use an AR headset as a makeshift planetarium machine. Are you telling me to use that, God...?
"It's about time to wrap up..."
"Yes, it is... It was... really fun, wasn't it?"
"Without a doubt."
My wallet definitely felt a bit lighter, but if you asked whether it was fun or not, it was overwhelmingly the former. The fact that the entire elite player base of a capitalism-simulator game was sent into shockwaves over the mere drop of a Diamond Badugamosu left quite an impression... Still, every event must eventually come to an end. The autumn sun drops like a suplex [*1], and before I knew it, it had almost completely set.
"It's not like there's an after-party or anything, so should we just head home?"
"Yes... I suppose so. If we wait too long... we might get caught in the rush hour going back."
The reverse version of the chaos we saw this morning was definitely not something I wanted to throw myself into willingly... So, even though it was a bit early, we decided to head back. It seemed we weren't the only ones with that idea; while some people were frantically trying to hit as many booths as possible before closing, there were plenty of others walking in the same direction as us.
"We really have to thank Iwamaki-san for this. Today was a blast."
"Y-Yes, definitely! I had... yes, I had an incredibly wonderful time, too."
That was the most important thing, especially since I dragged her around for my own selfish interests in the second half. Feeling a slight sense of relief, we passed through the entrance gate carrying bags that were significantly heavier than when we arrived—and right at that moment, the device in my pocket let out a cheerful *ping*.
『Thank you so much for coming to the Japan Gaming Expo today! Calculating your Visit Bonus now!!』
Several bubbles containing game developers' logos materialized in the hologram surrounding the hardcore carnivorous mascot. Utopia, Royale, Supernova... Wow, we really did hit up a lot of places today.
『Calculation complete! Your Visit Bonus total is 75 points! Goal reached!! As a completion reward, I'll give you an item code you can use in the games released by the developers you visited today!!』
An item code? I could understand it for something like Bakumatsu, but does the concept of item codes even exist for a game like ShanFro, which strictly separates the real world from the game world?!
"Rei-san, apparently this is an item we can use in ShanFro."
"Hyu... I-It seems so! Um, it says... Physical... Remodel Pass? Body modification?"
Honestly, hearing a word like "body modification" associated with ShanFro was less sketchy and more straight-up terrifying. If this were Bakumatsu, I'd just laugh it off... Since in Bakumatsu, even if you turned yourself into a full-body cyborg, you'd probably just get a dango skewer shoved into your core and explode anyway. You're better off spending your money on clothes, since that's the only thing that carries over when you die.
"It says 'Currently Unavailable,' which probably means we need to clear some specific condition in-game to progress it, but..."
"Since players are... entities connected to the Divine Age... Maybe it's related to unlocking something from that era...?"
The most suspicious candidate is Leviathan... Well, I don't plan on touching it for a while anyway, since I've already set my motivation vector elsewhere. From the snippets of conversation I overheard at the Supernova booth, apparently a massive war is about to break out in the Third Galaxy.
The Third Galaxy just so happens to be where I last saved my data. Which means whether I join the fight directly or just spectate, I'm already right on the front lines of the hottest spot in the game... There's no way I'm missing out on that. I don't have a wife to pawn off, but it's definitely worth sacrificing my ShanFro play-time for.
"It looks like we could use this for quite a few things."
"Yeah... Well, let's just head home for now."
"Yes... let's."
And so, we left the Mega-Float Site and headed toward the maglev train station to return home──
...
......
.........
Or so I thought, but it didn't quite work out that smoothly.
.........
......
...
Okay, wait. Let's calm down and assess the situation.
First, before boarding the maglev, Rei-san went to "pick some flowers", and I offered to hold her bags so she wouldn't have to carry them all in with her.
Then, since I had some free time while waiting, I bought a black coffee from a station kiosk and immediately regretted not getting the lightly sweetened one instead. I also slightly regretted buying a cold one. But whatever, that doesn't matter.
The problem was that upon returning from the restroom, Rei-san was very obviously being hit on by a sleazy pickup artist.
"I mean... given how Rei-san looks, getting hit on is par for the course, I guess..."
But still, does it have to be now of all times? Knowing full well that Rei-san had zero intention of humoring him didn't mean I could just stand there and watch her look so uncomfortable.
He just had that absolute "pickup artist" vibe to him... or rather, he had the face of a guy who looked like he'd hit on people... which might be rude to say, but he genuinely looked like he was doing it and enjoyed doing it...
"Um, I have a train to catch..."
"Nah, nah, it's a maglev, right? Missing one won't kill you. Come on, let's just chat for a bit at that cafe over there."
His technique was so archaic it could be studied in a classic literature class. Not that I know anything about the latest trends in picking up girls... Well, what should I do? It's obvious she's uncomfortable. But I don't know how to deal with this kind of situation... Wait, no?
"Can I pull this off?"
Is this really the right move, though...? I mean, this is a method for dealing with pickup artists straight out of a trash game. But I don't exactly have the time to call Iwamaki-san and ask her how the handsome love interest usually protects the heroine from creeps... Screw it, here goes nothing.
"Look, the fact that we met here has gotta be fate or..."
"Hey, Rei-san, is this guy a friend of yours?"
"Rakuro-kun!"
Alright, I made my move. The pickup artist shifted his gaze toward me. It was an assessing look, probably trying to figure out my relationship with Rei-san. He was likely calculating whether he could still establish dominance even if I was her boyfriend. But unfortunately for him, the software currently installed in my brain was the soul of Pickled Tuna Sunraku! This is the exact strategy for the one-time event where you have to defend the heroine from a pickup artist during the high-speed in-game year to avoid the nightmare "Pizza Route"!!
"Hey man, I'm kinda talking to her right now, so if you don't mind not interrupting?"
"Rei-san, looks like the next train is almost here."
"Eh, ah, yes."
"Listen here buddy, using such stale pickup lines is gonna drag your whole vibe down into looking like some baggy-clothed punk, you know?"
"Huh? What, you picking a fight?"
"By the way, Rei-san, did you want to grab dinner somewhere? Eating on the train is fine, but I think stopping by a family restaurant would be nice too."
"Eh, eh? Ah, yes, that sounds──"
"Hey you, Mr. Pickup Artist, your game is way too light. You lack bitterness. Do you know why? Aaaand thinking time."
"Hah? What the hell are you—" "Times up! The correct answer is 'you lack bitterness'! As a consolation prize, you can have this half-drank coffee." "Wha, oh?"
Even a single second of delay is a fatal loss! To prevent fate from spiraling into the Pizza Route, a Love Clock player must chain their dialogue lines flawlessly! I don't give a crap what you're saying; if I can't skip the dialogue, I just have to mash the A button to force the conversation forward...!!
"See ya later, normie. Drink that and learn what true bitterness tastes like."
Alright, I got through it. I cleared the event, right? I'll just give Rei-san a look and get us out of here before—
The very next second, a cold sensation hit the top of my head, and my left eye's vision was completely engulfed by black liquid.
Author's Afterword
Q. Why is this update so late?
A. Because I struggled tremendously to even imagine a scenario where the heroine gets hit on.
Translator's Notes
- [1] The Original Proverb: 秋の日は釣瓶落とし (Aki no hi wa tsurube-otoshi). A tsurube is a traditional wooden bucket used to draw water from a well. When you let go of the rope, the bucket plummets down the well instantly. The proverb means "the autumn sun drops like a well-bucket"—referring to how quickly the days get shorter and how fast it gets dark in autumn. The author takes the traditional proverb and swaps out otoshi (drop) for Suplex
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