Chapter 532: A Requiem For You, Part 1
Author's Preface
Well then, time for Earth advantage Ancient Battlefield... (My body seeks battle)[*1]
Who is Dordona?
I feel bad for my boy Areadbhair, but my impression of Dordona-shi is "a presumed old man who died because he messed up his elemental match-ups." As for what he did right before he died, I can kind of guess based on the situation Areadbhair was stuck in... but let's try a little leading question here.
"Giants, brave dragon-hunting warriors, those who live by the weapon. Just how much do you know about Dordona?"
"Why, he's a hero on par with Odinu!"
"Yeah, Odinu the Guardian and Dordona the Wanderer! There's not a Giant alive who hasn't heard the tales of those two!!"
"I heard he spent his twilight years in peace, but..."
"To face an unprecedented calamity and vanish... True glory, indeed!!"
Hmm, not helpful at all. Well, I at least figured out he was in a state of retirement right before he challenged Goldunine. Alright, time to build the narrative.
"Dordona of the Areadbhair... His brave name was a tale of the past... In his twilight years, though he carried Areadbhair, he lived a peaceful life..."
Honestly, if there's someone in here from Dordona's generation, I'm screwed... But if he's an old friend of the supposedly immortal Vash, he should belong to a fairly old generation.
"But then she appeared! Do you all know her?!"
I raise my voice here. It's the boss character's entrance. If I were dealing with players, a surreal description might be fine, but against NPCs... people without a meta-perspective, important figures in the story must be depicted grandly.
"Her name is Goldunine! The white serpent who despises all life and scatters venom and curses!"
"I know of it! The nightmare of the Western End"
"The nightmare of the Western End... I heard it was a monster with four heads."
Cut in right here!
"No, you are mistaken! Its true form is a woman who commands four Dragon Serpents. She possesses a human form roughly the same size as this body."
"How do you know such a thing?"
"Hey now, Fione... where do you think I pulled Areadbhair out from? I fought her."
Well, if you only look at the results, it looked like I got beaten to a pulp... but since it was practically a win, it's safe.
But the fact that I "fought Goldunine" seems to carry enough weight to mix respect into the Giants' gazes. Good, good, praise me more.
"This sword was deeply, deeply thrust into a certain place. That is the greatest proof of Dordona's final battle."
I gather their gazes, waiting for the chatter to die down and for all the Giants to look at me... and resume my bardic performance.
"This Areadbhair was deeply, deeply impaled in the torso of one of the Nagas. Now then, if you brave and daring individuals were still surviving into your old age, your bodies creaking, unable to move as freely as you'd like... and a Naga bared its fangs at your homeland, gouging out the mountains and rivers, tearing up the earth... what would you do?"
"Naturally, we'd fight!"
"Yeah! Until our fists shatter and our blades chip!"
"That is the glory of the Giants!!"
"Yes! Exactly! Dordona of the Areadbhair rose to the occasion!!"
As I thrust the tip of Areadbhair Rebuild toward the heavens, the Giants erupt in cheers of "Ooooh!!"
"What is a serpent that devours mountains and rivers! Does it have the wings or claws to make a dragon-hunting hero fear it?!"
Bang! Clang!! The excited Giants express their elation by slamming their weapons into the floor. By the way, the second sound was Dirnadia bringing down a punishing fist on someone's head. You shouldn't crack the floor, guys.
"Waking his creaking body, he took the passion that had long since faded and cast it into the furnace of his heart, making it burn anew! And Areadbhair answered its master! These blazing flames are the greatest proof!!"
"Ooh! Our hero!!"
"The hero's flame that burns dragons!!"
"Dammit, bring us some booze!!!"
Just stick to popcorn and cola. But beware, pulling off a caramel popcorn and carbonation combo will put your bladder's countdown into overdrive. In the first place, popcorn steals moisture from your mouth, so you drink your juice way faster... Oops, getting sidetracked.
"Knowing full well he couldn't win, knowing that even in his prime, it would surely be a desperate struggle... Would an aged hero wisely flee?"
"Nay!!!"
"Indeed! Dordona did not flee!! Far more massive than himself! Far more vile! Facing a great evil, there was not a single shadow cast upon the hero's honor!!"
The classic trope is an unwavering promise; there's no need for eccentric twists.
Seeing the Giants getting so hyped up that I'm almost put off by it, all staring at me waiting for the rest, my bardic roleplay makes remarkable progress.
"Ignite your passion! Let your hot blood roar! The aged hero bravely stood against it! Fear not, for as long as Dordona and Areadbhair are together, even a thousand dragons could be slain!!!"
───However.
Yes, from here on out, it starts with a "However".
It's the dark development typical of flashback arcs. I have to take the lame conclusion of him charging in without properly checking elemental match-ups and dying, and turn it into something sorrowfully heroic, painfully refreshing... decorating it, adding toppings, customizing it, and serving it up to the customers.
"However, my friends. As you may have already faintly realized... Areadbhair is now in my hands. Areadbhair, separated from Dordona's grasp... had decayed to a sorrowful degree."
The moment I spoke those words, the Giants' clamor abruptly stopped. Of course it did; no matter how much you pile on the dramatization, you can't change the ending. So at the very least, I'll pile on honor as a parting gift.
"Oh, those accursed Nagas. Unable to fly through the sky, unable to tear with claws, unable to brace themselves on legs... That is why they were not dragons, but serpents..."
"Ahhh!" one of the Giants lets out a mournful cry. Even if they look like beautiful women, their massive size always startles me. There's a genuine fear that the wind pressure from their sneeze could blow me away.
"Areadbhair is the flame that destroys dragons. However, it is not as if it is powerless against other foes... But... but... it lacked the power to burn a Naga... and Dordona's body sustained wounds beyond recovery."
Well, considering he seemingly had at least enough strength left to stab the sword in at the end, I really have to use my brain for the description from here on out.
"I saw the Nagas with my own eyes. Too massive, too long... Oh, in that moment, I intuitively understood! Dordona, too, surely fell to those terrifying fangs."
A sorrowful atmosphere spread through the "Embassy." After all, from here on is the process leading up to Dordona's defeat and death. Regarding this part, it's 100% dramatization... or rather, imagination, but I'm probably roughly on the mark.
"One arm bitten off, his flank gouged out. Evil venom coursed through his body, and his rusty, creaking frame let out a scream."
"Oh, how could..."
"Do you know the pain of an irreversible, fatal venom coursing through the body? Agony that erodes the heart even more than the flesh, as if pinning down your life's struggles and tormenting you until you can no longer move..."
During my time playing this game, the number of times I've died to poison—including a scorpion's digestive venom—can't be counted on one hand, even if you define one finger as 10. But I don't really know what actually happens when you take a direct hit from Goldunine's venom.
Well, based on the state of the Vorpal Bunnies at the Rabituza defensive line, it's probably a debuff that makes your body crack open.
"Goldunine carves fissures; its eroding venom shatters life. 'Perish, life. Shatter to the very tips of your claws...' Just how much hatred birthed that venom, I do not know."
I haven't progressed the Unique Scenario EX, after all. Plus, there's the fact that Wimp is, well, a wimp, so she's not a reliable reference. Her hatred of people is just the kind of aversion a shut-in with communication issues has to going outside. Basically, I'm just the parent who brings her food. Should I beat her up, that little brat?
Oh, Dordona, just how exactly did you kick the bucket?
Four Nagas and that Goldunine. Being left out to rot would probably be a better fate. Were you eaten, trampled and ground into paste...?
The Giants surely pictured that scene as well. With the exception of Dirnadia, who closed her eyes and showed no reaction, their tension had dropped to its lowest point.
"However, Areadbhair's flame had not yet been extinguished."
Rest assured, Dordona. I told you I'd give you a parting gift. Flashbacks have value and demand precisely because they aren't meaningless to the present!
This is where the climax starts. I'm going to hype it up by 990%!!
Author's Afterword
Q. Why is Sunraku so good at bardic roleplay?
A. Because there was a period where Pencilgon got super addicted to TRPGs, so Katzo and Sunraku ended up doing a ton of roleplaying as collateral damage.
Since he also had the precedent of Deep Slaughter's evil roleplaying, he intuitively understands the "points" where to inject emotion.
And also, Bardic Divine Punishment.
Translator's Notes
- [1] Ancient Battlefield: "Earth advantage Ancient Battlefield" refers to Granblue Fantasy's Unite and Fight, specifically one where Earth-element characters have the advantage. "My body seeks battle" refers to an internet meme derived from Armored Core.
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